If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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