we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
