that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
