Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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