Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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