I think im going to throw up on grandma
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
