i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night