So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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