Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
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