3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
