a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize