Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
im six kinds of drunk right now
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
The Olympian is in my bed
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