Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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