When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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