yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
