I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize