he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
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