i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
