so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
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Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
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:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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