Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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