Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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