It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
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I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
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If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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