I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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