I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
wakey wakey hands off snakey
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
