Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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