she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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