Texts From Last Night

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  (312): View more from Illinois

  My room smells like vodka and shame

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  (312): My room smells like vodka and shame http://tfl.nu/t2bn
  Replies (7) Good night (1975) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!

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  (248): Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count! http://tfl.nu/jr1g
  Replies (5) Good night (904) Bad night (818)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  thus making me awesome and them whores

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  (216): thus making me awesome and them whores http://tfl.nu/kdn8
  Replies (14) Good night (3355) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts

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  (847): his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts http://tfl.nu/kozn
  Replies (11) Good night (4190) Bad night (1127)
• Favorite

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  oh, you finally did the dishes then?

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  No, bought new ones.

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  (980): I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight. (704): oh, you finally did the dishes then? (980): No, bought new ones. http://tfl.nu/21up
  Replies (48) Good night (7734) Bad night (1367)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.

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  (256): Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs. http://tfl.nu/y8sy
  Replies (23) Good night (2380) Bad night (4658)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.

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  (505): We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee. http://tfl.nu/uw8q
  Replies (7) Good night (1227) Bad night (3488)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me

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  (847): as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me http://tfl.nu/nasi
  Replies (23) Good night (6219) Bad night (1782)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar

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  (605): you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar http://tfl.nu/3k40
  Replies (17) Good night (1518) Bad night (2722)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.

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  (724): Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies. http://tfl.nu/sr2h
  Replies (17) Good night (2834) Bad night (639)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.

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  (804): and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start. http://tfl.nu/94bc
  Replies (6) Good night (1272) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes

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  (760): This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes http://tfl.nu/v44x
  Replies (2) Good night (1247) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.

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  (678): I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated. http://tfl.nu/ulsy
  Replies (3) Good night (540) Bad night (730)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean

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  (518): I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean http://tfl.nu/nhpo
  Replies (2) Good night (1606) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days

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  (917): Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days http://tfl.nu/z3dv
  Replies (2) Good night (479) Bad night (355)

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