I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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