Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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