that's an acceptable place to lick
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
