Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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