Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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