i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
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