Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
