Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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