his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
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