She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
In other news, I just burned my penis
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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