Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
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