Whoa Z and x make the same sound
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
