Just mADE A PArabola og urine
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
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Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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