I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize