Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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