He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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