It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
