i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize