So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
