i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?