hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
