Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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