I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
