:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
