they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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